When we fall asleep, I am told that we go through a few phases, one of which is curiously named after an ageing American rock band. I’ve never quite come to terms with the whole REM thing because just conceptualising any rapid movement going on beneath my eyelids when I’m trying to sleep freaks me out.

All of which leads me to an admission of my concentration problems while listening to technical wizards painfully complicating our already over-complicated lives with their confident use of vocabulary which they must have made up. It’s my waking version of REM – the curtains are drawn but the lights are on as I scrabble 27 other possible more exciting meanings for their latest acronym.

Why can’t this man (because, let’s face it, they usually are, sorry chaps) explain this concept in a way in which I will understand? Einstein managed to give us a very truncated version of quite a tricky issue so WHY CAN’T YOU? Alan, our Web African tech guru, always takes a wonderfully deep breath as he digs deep into his vault of knowledge and reconfigures for non-techies like me but I can see it exhausts him. For all the Alan’s out there, these blogs are not for you. I’m sorry.

For those of us who still believe that gigs are something our favorite musicians should be producing rather than our ISP, read on!

I plan to write regular blogs on explaining in the simple way I understand, a few of the commonly asked questions of Web Africa and probably several of our fellow ISPs.